#but i DID have a coupon for the book they talked about in patreon class this week

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

just BARELY sneaking in under the wire for National Buy A Book Day, go me!!!

[dominimoonbeam]

Totally Normal Meet Cute Script - Part 3

The final part to this absolutely normal meet cute story!

warning: it's not a normal meet cute... it's a slasher. you're in a slasher. good luck!

Performed by Jouska over on his youtube and his patreon!

Part 3 - It Always Ends at a Party

I absolutely agree, a house party is a bad idea.

But if we were going to go, we should go together, right? Safety in numbers.

Really, what would be safer, glasses, being the only two people staying home or being in a frat house packed to the rafters with other people?

[laughs] Okay, safe from a serial killer, obviously. Not safe from…everything else that can go wrong.

It’s not a fire hazard. It’s just a party!

I’m not saying that we should definitely go, I’m just saying that maybe we should think about going. It would be fun, and the last couple months have been… intense.

It’s not until next week anyway. You can think about it. Here, I’ll tack the flyer up on your corkboard right between this incredibly detailed list of goals for the year and… Is this an expired coupon for soft serve? Why do you still have this?

[laughs] You’re lactose intolerant!

I’m tossing the coupon.

What else do you have up here… I’m seeing a lot of sticky note reminders and take out menus…

I still have a half hour before my class starts. That’s plenty of time to get across campus.

It is for me… You should really reconsider coming out running with me in the morning. We can do a light jog! We’ll take it at your pace, just around the campus and back. You’ll love it, glasses. Okay, that’s a lie, you’re going to hate it, but I will let you complain the whole way and after we get back, you’re going to realize how much more awake you feel. It’ll change your whole day!

Really? [surprised] You’ll really give it a try?

Wait, are you agreeing to go running so you can turn down the party?

[laughs] I would take that deal, yeah… I’d much rather have you to myself in the morning than share you with a bunch of people at a loud party.

I’m not trying to charm you into anything!

That’s just flirting, glasses. I’m flirting with you.

[pause]

Wait… Did you not realize I’ve been flirting with you? Oh, glasses… Come on!

No, this isn’t a joke!

I’ve been sleeping in your bed for the last four nights!

[laughs] Extenuating circumstances?

Uh-huh… and what about when our study session turned into a make out session yesterday?

Are you blushing? Now? You weren’t blushing when you kissed me!

If we’re not dating, then we’re at least more than friends.

No? So, this is how all your friendships look?

I don’t know why you’re cramming all your books into that bag like you’re about to leave. This is your room and you just got back. I know your schedule, glasses. You have no more classes today. You even changed into your comfy clothes. Which you did right here in the room with me, by the way. I saw everything.

[laughs] Oh god, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this red before…

So, you can kiss me, and sit in my lap, and snuggle up against me at night, so long as we never talk about it? Is that what’s going on here?

[closer, smiling] Am I like… your secret boyfriend? You know, I’d make great arm candy if you want to parade me around some. Like to, say, a party full of our peers?

[laughs] Okay! I’ll drop it for now. You can think about it. [kiss] I’m going to class. I’ll pick up dinner on my way back and then we can talk some more about how we’re definitely not a couple…

-

Glasses, why is my stuff in the hall? Are you throwing me out? I can’t tell because you folded everything so neatly…

Oh shit, you’re actually angry. Why?

Which dead girl?

What are you—

Oh.

Yeah… I mean, I met Casey a few times, but I didn’t know her.

What? Who have you been talking to?

I’m not lying to you! I… I slept with her a couple times freshman year. We were at some of the same parties and had some friends in common.

No, she was just using me to try to make one of my friends jealous. And that was fine because it’s not like I was hurt. We barely knew each other.

Why does it matter what friend?

[laughs unhappily] You don’t think I have friends?

Come on, glasses…

No, I stopped hanging out with them.

[raises voice] Because they were assholes! Because they made me feel like an asshole!

[pause]

[sighs] I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to yell.

Nothing happened. I just… I didn’t like myself or my life, and realizing that was rough. I bailed on everything I could. On clubs and on friends. I just, bailed, and no one fucking noticed.

[to himself] No one noticed. That’s the kind of friends I had.

Are…Are you seriously asking me that? I’m not using you. I was trying to get my life the way I wanted it and I just…I always had a crush on you and I decided to get to know you better.

Bullshit? Are you kidding? I’m telling you—

Just because you can’t see how amazing you are, doesn’t mean that I don’t! You care a lot about everything you do and everyone in your life.

No! I’m not trying to get you to fall for me just to make myself feel better. I can’t believe you’re—

[pause]

[confused] The guy from my building?

Okay, yeah, I did say I didn’t know him… I didn’t want to talk about it! So what if I did? I told you, I hadn’t talked to any of my old friends more than a few words for the last year. I never really knew them—

I didn’t know the couple! What the fuck are you even driving at?

You… [realization] Glasses, do you think I’m the killer?

Logical? No, it’s not! I was with you when we found those bodies! Do you think I’m some sort of deranged mastermind? You think I set it up like that? Why? To scare you into my arms? Oh my god, of course! And then I killed the guy in my building, somehow knowing that my dorm would be closed and I’d get to come knock on your door? If I’m this fucking brilliant, then why would I need you to be my partner for the final? Clearly, I’m a genius.

What?

[quieter] You don’t really think that. You’re upset about Casey and scared about the murders so you’re spinning out. No. No, if you thought I was planning to murder you, you wouldn’t fucking dump my shit outside and wait for me to come back to argue with you about it. You would have called the cops. Did you call the cops, glasses? No. Because you know I wouldn’t hurt you, or anyone else.

So what if I knew them? You probably would have too if you went to a party or joined a club, or just fucking looked up from your books!

No, of course I didn’t just make friends with you for the final project. You… You looked lonely. You looked lonely the way I felt lonely. And the more we talked, the more I liked you. That’s all. There’s nothing shady or murderous about it.

[pause]

[sad/tired sigh, annoyed] My building is open again, so I’ll move my stuff back to my room.

Fine, glasses. Have it your way. I’ll see you around.

-

[house party sounds, muffled music and background voices]

[surprised] Glasses? What are you doing here?

My roommate told you— You mean, you came to see me?

It’s been a few days… I didn’t think you wanted to talk.

[sighs] No, I’m sorry. I should have told you the whole truth, but I didn’t have anything to do with it. I barely knew them.

Glasses… Look at me. [softer] Look at me.

You know me. I would never hurt you. You know that, right?

You… [smiles] Yeah, I’d love to be your partner for the final.

Wait, did you come by yourself?

You shouldn’t have done that. The campus has a whole buddy system rule in place. [mock gasp] I can’t believe you broke a rule!

[smiling] So, you were counting on someone walking you home? I can definitely do that. You want a drink while we’re here?

Yeah, take mine. I’ll grab another. Do you want to meet some people? Or do you want to go hide in a corner and make out?

Yes, that’s exactly what happens at a party, glasses. Later we summon a demon with a Ouija board, but first we’re going to play spin the bottle and kiss some strangers… [laughs] I’m joking! About the Ouija board and the bottle. We’re still kissing strangers.

Ow! No hitting, we just made up!

Okay, stay put, I’ll be right back.

[party sounds]

[other voice, muffle from distance] What the hell is that?

[power going off, music cutting off, other voices rising in panic] Who did that? Turn the lights back on! It’s not funny! Someone—

[a scream, foot falls as everyone starts running]

Glasses!

Is that you? Oh, thank god. No, no, I don’t think that’s a prank…

[another muffled scream]

Come on!

Don’t let go of my hand. I think there was a closet over here…

[horror sounds (I’m so sorry audio creator)]

[opening the closet door and then closing it, muffling the sounds even more]

Shhh… It’s okay.

[breathing, sharp inhale]

[heavy footsteps walking slowly by outside, floorboards creaking, standing there, killer breathing hard in his mask, dramatic pause, walking away]

[exhale, still whispering] I think he left. It’s okay. We’re okay. We’ll just wait here until the police show up.

[nervous whisper laugh] I guess I did manage to get you in a closet even without spinning the bottle…

Did you see him through the crack in the door? Yeah. Yeah, he was huge. And that mask? What the fuck was that about? Did you recognize him?

I don’t know, glasses. I feel like if we knew a guy that size, we could recognize his build even with the mask on. There can’t be that many of them lumbering around campus…

What? No, I don’t smell anything… Oh shit.

Yeah, that’s smoke…

[muffled fire sounds]

[coughing] I don’t know. He could have started it, or it could just be a candle that got knocked over… Either way we need to get out of here.

We can’t just sit here and burn. Even if he’s waiting, we have to make a run for it.

Here. [keys jangling] Hang onto these. We’re going to bolt for my car. I parked along the woods, near the footpath.

You’re holding the keys in case… In case you get there first, glasses. Unlock the car, get in, lock it, and drive.

[laughed a little] I know you don’t have your license, but I know you can do it.

If a cop materializes just to arrest you, then at least you’ll be safe, right?

Right.

[coughing, fire crackling] No, if you get to the car first, don’t wait for me. I’m faster than you. If I’m not with you… Just don’t wait for me, okay? I’ll be there or I’ll find another way. He’s probably moved on by now anyway.

You can do this. You are the smartest, strongest person that I know. Just run and don’t look back.

Okay…

Three.

Two.

One.

[throwing open the door and running, fire sounds, footfalls, another door, muffled fire and the sound of the night] Go. Gogogo!

Keep going! I’m right behind you!

[running, gravel]

You see the car?

Yeah, just—

[reaching the car, fumbling the keys and opening the door]

[stops, silence]

[night sounds, muffled fire sounds, far away sirens, his pained groan somewhere close by]

[popping the trunk, gravel steps, pulling something metal from the trunk]

[speaker panting, fighting with the slasher]

[injured, surprised] Glasses? What are you—

No! Don’t come back. Just run!

[thwap as glasses hits the slasher]

Oh shit. Hell yes, hit him again!

[another thwap and someone thudding down]

[speaker panting, struggling to his feet, sirens getting closer]

You came back for me…

[coughing laugh] I think this is a little above and beyond for study buddies, glasses.

I got stabbed in the side trying to save you and you came back and fought a serial killer with my baseball bat, I think you can admit we’re more than just partners for the final.

[fire sounds. sirens]

Does this mean I get to move back into your dorm room?

[smiling] Yes, you can keep the bat.

[pained laughs] And you were right about the party being a bad idea… and a fire hazard.

[fire crackling, house falling apart sounds, cop cars skidding to a stop on the gravel]

Oh shit… Glasses… Where did he go?

He was right there. I didn’t even hear him get up.

Yeah, let’s get out of here. I think I might need that ambulance.

[think Halloween theme song fade out]

-

- Authors Note: I imagined this story as a meet cute going on in the background of a college campus slasher flick. In my head, the killer is primarily terrorizing someone else on campus and if it were a movie, Glasses and Dash would be background characters. When the killer vanishes at the end, he's probably loping off through the woods after his final girl to have that last battle before the credits roll.

And do I feel like an asshole for leaving instructions like "horror sounds" and "think Halloween theme song fade out"? Yes. I do.

Does Jouska somehow make that magic happen anyway? Yes, he does!

Will I learn to stop doing it? ...No.

[a-ka-neart]

Today’s post deals with the special finishes I want for some prints in my shop.  Before we get to it I do have a couple small updates.

I’m holding a 4th of July sale!  With the code happy4th18 orders $10 or more get 25% off.  That is my biggest discount ever!  The coupon counts towards the entire store, which includes preorder and clearance items.  The sale goes through July 8th.

Starting yesterday orders over $20 now qualify for free shipping.  It also works with coupons, but the amount may need to be post discount.

I added a little new art recently.  When things calm down it’s going to be a continuous thing.

Sunny Mountains Practice

Beach Painting

Aside from that I am still trying to complete a gallery piece.  I also have a book cover to work on, and my friends’ movie blog (plug!).  Then back to comics.

Did you know I have a mailing list?  Click here to subscribe to it!  You’ll get a special sign up coupon, and a birthday coupon.  I may only send an email out once every week or, two.  There will also be sale or coupon notifications within 24 hours of it starting.

Anyway…

My eventual goal for prints, Artist Alley, and the shop is to print from home.  I felt I’d save a lot of time or wait, and money doing so.  I want to be able to print thumbnails for color control.  Work is done in RGB and I always have the worst time converting to CMYK.  If I had a dedicated profile it would probably be doable.  It’s my biggest hurdle printing from digital files.

I’ve read about using pdf files instead of jpgs.  Have people done this and had success?  I think I did it once and it may have gone better.

I may make the equipment a Patreon goal.  I’m hoping when I reach it I’d have the capacity to warrant printing from home.

I do have a few specific prints to talk about today, as well.

Icy Glare

The only special plan I really had for Icy Glare was a special holographic overlay.  I’m having a hard time finding it.  I’m sure I have the know how, but I lack the equipment to do it myself.

The two finishes I had in mind were either snow flurries or a frosted window.  I was always fascinated by frosted windows and their crazy patterns as a kid.  I tried to achieve some of that with the border.  Since I know it can be done, I’d want the overlays to reflect in cool colors only.

*sigh*

Other than that I was wondering about silver ink or foil on the embroidery of Helena’s obi.

Looking Back

One of my main pieces and my online avatar.  I actually had some of these effects in mind while I was making the print.  It has two main components: the chrysanthemums of the kimono and the negative space.

If I were ever to make the kimono the chrysanthemum flowers on it would be lined in gold foil.  I want to create this in the print.  A friend of mine (plug!) brought in gold foil for me to try, but we had a sizing issue with the fine lines.

What I decided on for a base was a coating of bronze ink.  I decided on Dr. Ph Martin’s Iridescent Bronze.  The idea was to loosely scratch some on in random areas.  Before it dried I would rag some off (hopefully without smudging).  I wanted it to be a little textured as well.  Another friend of mine suggested gold nail glitter for that.  I may mix gold with copper for the warmer tone I want to achieve.  It’s very fine so I think it will work.

The biggest headache I’ve had is how I would achieve the pearlescent effect of the negative space.  I was looking at Perfect Pearls shimmer spray, but it seems to be sold out on Amazon.  They came out with an alternative called Dylusions Shimmer Spray, which could work.  My final thought was glitter infused mica powder, provided it would work as a light spray.

My only gripe is not having these in front of me to experiment.

The main challenge may be the risk of ruining the print.  I used Catprint for the first batch.  I’m not sure what type they use.  I may be able to minimize risk avoiding alcohol or other solvents, and too heavy of application.

Future Prints or Other Options

I’ve been looking into foil and special papers.  I have already done a few with felt texture paper.  I know Catprint also has shimmer papers in white or cream.  I’ve also been looking at metal prints, pearlescents, wall scrolls, and puzzles.  I’ve been bookmarking recommendations which I can include later.

I feel like I’m trying to achieve something that may be hard to do at the small scale level.

Thoughts or suggestions?  I feel like I’m making this much harder than it needs to be.  I’m also curious about the demand for these special finishes.

When I do have my solution I will write another post detailing my finds or process.

I also wanted to get into casting.  One idea I had was Mr. Snail magnets or ornaments.  I also had an idea for Triune portrait coasters or medallions.

The blog will return with:

Some links go to Amazon.  This site is in the Amazon Affiliate Program.

How Should I Achieve These Prints? Today's post deals with the special finishes I want for some prints in my shop.  Before we get to it I do have a couple small updates.